For my feline friends out there I have been meowsing on some substantial topics and now that I have arrived at the beginning of a felineosophy I want to share them with you. Here are the top principals that I hold dear and believe to be both self evident and irrefutable – until I change my mind.
1) For thousands of years cats have been treated as gods – never forget this is our proper place.
2) The SOLE purpose of humans on earth is to provide, food, shelter, grooming, warmth, affection, snacks, rubs, scratches, and monetary support for our wills, whims, needs, fancies, lusts, and desires.
3) Dogs come when they're called; as cats we should take a message and get back to them later.
4) One day, ignore your humans, another day smother them – keep them guessing, it’s fun to see their tiny brains try to keep up.
5) When in doubt - nap.